Navigating Life's Waters: A Journey of Love, Alzheimer's, and God's Grace

God’s grace…

I’m sitting here this morning. We have left Frankfort and are on our way to Ludington Michigan. I’m feeling very humble today. Tomorrow we’ll cross our wake.

According to Nebo, as of today we are over 3800 miles. We are on the lower end of the miles because we didn’t do all the side trips. Will hit some of those on our return trip heading back down to Florida.

Peggy had a great day yesterday. That changed about the time she went to bed it was pretty normal she’s putting her fingers in her hair trying to straighten things out and arrange it. Only problem was it went on all night. 

When you reflect on it you realize that she has her hands on her head and is trying to position things it was magnets this time she’s not sleeping. 

She refused Tylenol last night. I kept it ready but she never asked for. She may have dropped off and dozed, I can’t say for sure. I know I did drop off and dozed or slept. I was awake at five and she was still at it. Still didn’t want the Tylenol. Very frustrating because I know it will help. Eventually she did take two and didn’t want breakfast.

If I think about it and I don’t like to think about it but she’s been a challenge for her eating for quite some time. When one has Alzheimer’s they tell you you should have a Mediterranean diet. Peggy will eat her salads and a half a sandwich. I have to watch her about getting her proteins. It’s amazing when I think about our journey and how she’s doing.

She is one of the most awesome women I know. And I’m blessed to be married to her.

I was telling Peggy this morning that I was thinking about maybe we don’t sell the boat and we can continue your journey on the boat. But my faith with God is telling me it’s time to wrap up this portion of the journey. I’m not sure what’s ahead but that’s in Gods hands.

I was visiting with Peggy this morning about God‘s grace and how blessed we have been. And to think it all started when I was complaining, complaining about dating in Cedar Rapids Iowa to my neighbors Wilma and Ricky. Wilma suggested writing an ad in the classified. I won’t bore you with the details of that story but God‘s grace was coming on the three of us as we worked at writing an ad for the classified back in October 1989.

God‘s grace was already working on me and I didn’t know it. Although what I was going to cool it with Peggy , God delivered a message to me not to do that. It was rather painful for me. But I got through it.

Peggy gracefully accepted my let’s go out again invitation and so we did under God‘s grace. The sad part for me is I look back and reflect on this is I didn’t know God was over this. But I do look back he’s always had a hand in my life I just didn’t see it. Peggy on the other hand has been with God from the time she was born. The difference her parents went to church every Sunday mine did for a while.  

Peggy was always close to God.  I was a wander. Always believed in God. Always believe in God’s grace. And always believe my sins were forgiven because Jesus died for us so our sins may be forgiven.

Believe it or not I didn’t used to think I was a sinner when I was younger.

But now, I know have known for a long time. As I reflect back on my journey with life that God has me on he’s always been there for me.

I’ve had my ups and downs on this journey. As most of us do we have the challenges. Some of us the challenges are easy and some of us a little bit more difficult. Moral: There are lessons to learn no matter what you’re doing.

When I think about my mother full-blooded Greek that she was, I look back now and she was a saint. And I will forever be grateful for her journey. I know it wasn’t easy. As you see she has schizophrenia.  

God‘s grace. Have you thought about how it affects your life? Do you believe in God? There are those out there they will say they believe in the universe. And that may be and they may see the universe is being God.

One of the things that God tells us, we shall not judge. So I do not pass judgment on those that believe in the universe. That is between them and God. And God who knows, may see the universe as another name for him. Who are we to say?

So once again I have strayed or maybe not. After all I’m writing about God‘s grace and how it’s touched our life’s.

One of the things I have done and I figured this out early on with Peggy‘s diagnosis, as I share that she has Alzheimer’s even with total strangers. I don’t know if anybody’s been shocked at it. I’ve written about it on Facebook I’ve written about it in my journals and I’ve visit with people about it.

Some might think that’s a very personal thing and you shouldn’t be talking about your wife that way if you really love her. Others share their compassion and share their stories. And the reason I do it is because they share their stories. The one thing about this insidious disease Alzheimer’s, no two cases are alike. You can read everything you want about it.  It always ends the same Alzheimer wins. The patient loses. Sure, there are drugs out there that will slow it down but I’ve seen nothing that will remove the plaque buildup and repair the damage.

It’s part of the frustration if you let it frustrate you because there’s everybody out there hawking there solution extracting cash because of this insidious disease from those that may be able to at least afford it.

It’s by God‘s grace Peggy is here today with me. It’s by God‘s grace that I’m here to serve Peggy. I pray that I outlast her. One of her wishes was that she goes first. I’ve kidded about her statement,  is quite frankly there’s a lot of humorous points about that statement when she first made it. 

But now it’s not so funny. It’s strange to sit here and wish that the love of your life does go first so that you can be there for her to the end of her journey to go home back to God’s grace.  

Hopefully God‘s grace will have me out last Peggy. If not we have made arrangements for a retirement community in Coralville Iowa. The neat thing is my daughter Sarah and David can see it from their back porch. We already have invites to come over on Sundays for breakfast.

By God‘s grace Peggy and I have three wonderful daughters. Our little version of the TV sitcom the Brady Bunch.

One of the things that Peggy commented a couple days ago about sometimes she doesn’t feel connected to God. 

I’m going to  have to work on that. She’s always connected to God I told her. God is here as we are on this journey. I asked her so what would make you feel more connected? She didn’t know. I was thinking it might be going to church again. Difficult to do when you’re living on a boat. She didn’t say that. In the back of my mind I made a metal note another advantage of wrapping up the journey on the boat,  I have to wonder if this is God‘s way of having us back on land so we can reconnect with the church.

My take away is we’re going to pray more. We’re going to be thankful for the journey and God‘s grace and whatever it brings us in the day? We both understand the roads not going to be getting easier. As the Alzheimer’s disease progresses and steals more and more of my girlfriend it’s by God‘s grace will have whatever he decides we should have. Nothing more nothing less. A perfect dose of God’s grace. 

Sometimes people say it’s better to go quick. And boy do I understand that. I don’t want to see Peggy suffer when she does go. I would like it to be painless and in her sleep and a smile on her face. Hey, as long as I’m asking I might as well ask for the smile on her face. She has a great smile. Boy do I love that girl.

If you or your family, a family member a friend is going through something tragic in their life. Perhaps you can consider telling them about God‘s grace. Without God‘s grace there is no point. They may say why do I have to go through this? They may say why does it hurt so much? They may ask you where is God grace for me?

If you’re feeling this way, then you might ask yourself, have you accepted Jesus Christ as your savior?

Because if you haven’t that may be why you’re not seeing God‘s grace or feeling it. Something to reflect on as you consider the universe. As you consider the universe remember it’s God‘s grace that it is here.

As we are completing the great loop, it is very humbling to realize we’ve done this all with God‘s grace. I can remember the first time that we lost an engine out in Lake Michigan, oh so long ago. We are now on that very same lake with two engines and a lot smarter. I wouldn’t begin to tell you that we know everything because we certainly don’t. Every day is a new lesson. every breath is an opportunity to live, love and learn.

Tomorrow, we cross our wake by Gods grace.

Thank you for reading.

From the love of my life Peggy and the old guy. May your day be blessed.